Sickipedia

Any chance of some funny sick jokes instead of outright racist rants? The original sickipedia wasn't about this shit. Here, have this one. Abdul from up the street knocked on my door, "Mr Jackson, I have spoke with the street and we would like to buy your house off you. " "Why? " I asked, "I'm the only one on the street who isn't a Pakistani. " "Yes, " replied Abdul, "we know, we think you are devaluing our properties. "

Brady's ashes scattered at sea after a secret cremation service? The absolute fucking cunts. They should have been buried on Saddleworth Moor and kept the fucking location secret. I hope his fucking death was slow and painful.

So sad to here about the death of Fats Domino. On the plus side, it's one less nigger in the world.

Ok Homer/Hannah/ect. Deleted all my jokes, lets see you fuck about now. I urge any real writers to take all their contributions off the site. The trolls can have it.

I went into a sex shop, "Excuse me, " I asked, "have you got a massive dildo?" "Yes sir, " the assistant said and showed me a massive black dildo. "Shall I wrap if for you sir? he asked. "No, " I replied, "but if you don't mind would you shove it up my arse as far as it will go, I've been thinking about voting conservative and I need a reminder of what's likely to happen if they win. "

I'll never forget the day, 26th March 2015. A spaceship landed and I was approached by an alien who gave me six numbers. "Use these on your lotto, " he said, "I will return in one week, please be here. " So I rushed off and used the numbers on the lottery. They were shit, not a fucking penny. So I went to the meeting place a week later and sure enough the craft landed again and the alien approached me, "Well I said, those numbers were a waste of time, what the fuck was all that about?" "We've been studying your language and customs for many years now, " replied the alien, "April fool you cunt."

This Muslim I was working with on a tower scaffolding lost his footing and slipped, I managed to grab his hand as he was dangling 150 feet in the air. "Please, please, " he pleaded, "don't let me drop, " "Will you eat my bacon sandwich if I pull you up? " I asked, "Yes, yes, of course I will, " he said. So I let him go, I'm not having a fucking Muslim steal my breakfast.

My welsh pal was bragging he'd had five sexual partners over a weekend, "Does that make me some kind of stud?" he asked. "No, it makes you a shepherd, " I replied.

Fancy going into government with a bunch of racist, bigoted right wing homophobic thugs. But I suppose the Democratic Unionist Party will soon get used to the Conservatives.

This Tottenham Jew walked up to a Liverpool fan before a game, "Oi, " he said, "before you fucking start, six million, and we've been milking it longer."