Sickipedia

Addict who blew £1.5 million gambling on Betfair sues company to get his money back. I hope he wins his case. He'll be able to make some awesome bets on Paddy Power for a few weeks.

This baby loves farts

BBC News: Waitrose-rejected autistic worker gets Asda offer. Good for him. He's gone from a company where his autism was a hindrance to another where it's a job requirement.

"You'll have to stop eating burgers, hot dogs, fried foods," the dentist said to my wife ? "Why, these don't have especially high sugar content ?" "No, just drop the cheeseburger for now, I have to look at your fucking teeth."

When I read that Jamaica had been flattened I thought fucking hell is Gemma Collins having another Caribbean holiday ??

"You disgust me," I said to my wife.... "What ? As you can see I started my new diet today..... only six Big Macs instead of seven."

At least he's not into pegging

Dirty Pedo

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Reports from Scandanavia confirm that several red crosses are appearing on streets outside tall buildings........ Unfortunately it's nothing to do with a show of solidarity with people over here.......... It's sufferers of seasonal affective disorder painting themselves a target to land on