Sickipedia

When a department store santa loses his job does he get the sack ? Do human cannon balls get fired? Do Pirates get told to told to sling their hook's? Do prostitutes get laid off? Do trapeze artists get let go?

Made my own guitar effects out of of people . My distortion is made from a dead politician's lips. Wah wah from placing a drum kick pedal strategically in front of a baby's face. Tremolo effect is created by taping the hand of a parkinsons sufferer to the volume button on the amp . Delay is achieved by nailing the manager of Network Rail's head to a piece of the fucking track.

I moved to pakistan last year my company is building a dam near islamabad . This morning I was awakened by the call to prayer, mosques and madrasas calling out everywhere. I step out into the sun, the heat is unbearable. I try to get breakfast in the local market area, everywhere men in full islamic dress and all the women in burqas. The area is dirty littered and run down a snapshot of the third world . I call in at one of the local eating establishments to get some food, the whiff of curry and spices everywhere  mixed in the unwashed sweaty odour of the locals . Alas no bacon or sausage butties around here. communication is quite awkward as I don't speak urdu and they don't speak english . To be honest I will be glad when my holiday back home to visit my parents is over . Things have really changed here in bolton.

I fucking hate google. It puts intelligent people with good memories and years of knowledge like myself, on the same level as complete and utter fuckwits .

President Trump in hospital after being bitten by a cobra. Oh no wait! "Snake News"

Boo hoo the isis bride wants to come home, because her baby would be looked after better in the uk . She wants to trade islamic state for the welfare state now. I say no, fuck her, she'd probably end up costing us a bomb .

Bandwagon time ... Indian covid ...charity album ...songs Korma chameleon : Culture Club Tears on my pilau : kylie Poppadom preach : Madonna Can't curry love : Phil Collins Kebaby Love : the supremes Skip to the Loo: Judy Garland . Sikh and destroy : Metallica Rice Rice baby : Vanilla Rice Chapatti on my shoulder : Cock sparrer Go man go (chutney mix) Alice Cooper

What's next fucking braille.?. This is not Sickipedia it's Fucking insipidpedia ..

Cowboy gets captured by indians the Chief says he must marry 1 of his daughters Or face death. He leads the cowboy to a teepee to choose The cowboy sees 3 squaws 1 sitting on a buffalo Skin 1 sitting on a bear skin and 1 sitting on a the skin he is told of a hippopotamus ...and yes i know u pendants they only live in africa He traded it with a white game hunter happy now...the chief says he can either marry her or both the squaws on the bear skin and buffalo skin ...the cowboy aks why She is so special ..the chief says Because the squaw on the hippopotamus Is equal to the sum of the squaws on the Other two hides..

After the bloke doing the bad puns in the kilt, lee something or other got off the podium, I started my rant at speakers corner in hyde park . All the sicki gang were there I saw wasp well he was obscured by his fat wife she was with a young lad in a ballerina outfit . There were 10 supergrasses wearing we love gary haggarty t-shirts, some mad bloke with markrees dressed as a chinese rock star carrying a jar of acid. Some ginger bloke looked like he'd just finished a boat race, kim making notes of everyones speeches so he could nick bits and write a better one. Two blokes heckling about the quality, a critic from the papers funniman . A bloke in a rain coat with an axe happy chopper, a bloke with a cat making funny comments looked a bit blacker than last time .whopps simmo and a bloke on a horse being fed peppermints and a perv at the back with one testicle being arrested for trying to chloroform girls in the back of an ambulance .