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stallion

Member since 8 years ago

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About Me

I wander around the Scottish Highlands with my dog and drink whisky.

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Scotland

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scotty

member since 8 years ago

stallion

8 days ago-Other-Animals

Using only a .22 pistol I survived a grizzly bear attack. My friend, who I shot in the knee, wasn't so lucky.

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I'm fucking livid that my daughter's Paki boyfriend got the shit kicked out of him by two racists. I paid for three.

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I've opened a restaurant for the sole use of Native Americans. You can't get a table unless you have a reservation.

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stallion

23 days ago-Other-Stupid

A lot of people say superheroes don't exist. Well, I've never seen Invisible Man. If that's not proof, I don't know what is!

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My favourite pickup line is, "I have a knife and a penis." Their reaction decides which I'll stick in them.

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I've been clean for a week now. However, I'm going to have to get out the bath now because I've run out of drugs.

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Don't you hate it when you've got a blocked nose and there's a whistle in it? I know the ref who sent me off does.

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stallion

one month ago-Other-Wordplay

I'm really good at making a cuppa for retarded people. It's my special tea.

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stallion

one month ago-Other-Wordplay

I met my old girlfriend at the pub tonight. I'm going to dump her because all my mates are calling me Wayne Rooney.

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stallion

one month ago-Crime-Murder

They say that one out of every four people has the potential to be a serial killer. So I killed three of my close friends. I should be safe now.

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