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Son: why is my sister called Teresa Dad: because your mum loves Easter - it's an anagram Son: thanks dad Dad: that's ok, Alan
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I recently entered a competition to see who had gained the most weight and lost the most hair. Obviously, it wasn’t called that. It was advertised as a ‘School Reunion’
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We used to have Empires run by Emperors. Then we had Kingdoms run by Kings. Now we have Countries..........
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About a month before our grandad died, we covered his back in lard... After that he went downhill very quickly!...
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Last nIght my wife text me saying she was in Casualty. I watched all 50 Minutes of the programme and I didn't see her once. She still hasn't come back yet and I'm starving!
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My old man always used to say “one up the bum, no harm done”, and that’s why he was sacked from the mortuary.
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“Now then, now then. Howzabout that peasants and servants” said Prince Andrew
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I've got the big C. Dyslexia
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I was having dinner with my boss and his wife and she said to me "how many potatoes would you like Brian?" I said "ooh I'll just have one please" She said "it's ok you don't have to be polite" "All right" I said "I'll just have one then you fat cunt”
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Hi! To ensure that this is a great place for everyone to have a wondeful time, we have some rules. Breaking them might result in a suspension or permanent ban from the site.
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Content designed to intimidate a person or group by any means including, doxxing, murder or injury, rape, harrasment etc.
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