Sickipedia

Biddy Baxter dead ! News of her funeral arrangements have just been released. She will not have a conventional burial, nor will she be cremated. Instead she will be interred in a time capsule, to be opened in 2099 !

ITV, current owners of the Big Brother Franchise today announced they had contracted with the Labour Party to help choose the new deputy leader of the party, candidates to be announced in due course. The candidates will be helicoptered onto the Scottish island of Gruinard for the selection process Kemi Badenoch said she was really looking forward to the bush tucker trials.

Donald Trump is reported to have issued an executive order imposing a 50% tariff on any tsunamis arriving on American shores, if true will that mean arriving tsunamis will be 50% bigger ?

I noticed that today the UK government finally managed to deport an illegal immigrant to France.There is a much simpler and cheaper way….make use of the SBS and those small boats which must be littering up the beaches of Kent by now. Load 10 illegals onto each ‘boat’ along with one SBS soldier armed with a Fairburn Syke knife and set them going, any disruptive behaviour by the migrants, the soldier can simply stab the boat in several places, thereby deflating it and he can then pop over the side for a leisurely swim back to Blighty.

Considering the recent denial, by the courts, to allow the removal of a recently arrived migrant back to France. Back to France....surely a cruel an unusual punishment !

As Kier Starmer Considers his choice of the next ambassador to the USA, can I respectfully suggest George Galloway ? No, okay I'll fuck off then.

The South Korean government today gifted Donald Trump with a golden set of tweezers and magnifying glass to help him pass the time as he awaited the arrival of the Chinese president.

Wank Holiday Monday. Did you get your five a day today ? Asking for a friend.

Elon Musk to potentially to receive a one trillion dollar bonus, surely a crime against the rest of humanity. He should be locked in a bank vault and not allowe to die until he has counted all those dollar bills.

Home Secretary Shabana Mahmood todaiy unveiled a raft of proposals to deal with the increasing flood of illegal immigrants into this country. I wonder if the raft she used was one abandoned on the sea shores of Kent.