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My last girlfriend left me due to my obsession with blankety blank. What makes it worse is that she took all the ___________ with her.
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Little known fact. There is a patron saint of checking bread rolls before they leave the oven. Saint john the bap test.
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I've started collecting old comics and store them in my cellar. However Jimmy Tarbuck and Tom O'connor are fucking furious.
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I went to one of those Turkish baths on holiday... They shaved with razor-sharp blade below the neck line, snipped ear & nose hairs, waxed chest hairs & plucked all the bum crack hairs, finishing with a moustache trim & alcohol rub... Honestly, the wife's never looked so good.
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Sorry to anyone who felt my joke about herbs and fish was inappropriate. I realise there’s a thyme and a plaice for these things...
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My uncle was a postman and a part time comedian. Terrible comic but his delivery was great.
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If anyone's interested. The self depreciation society is taking applications for new members. I've already put myself down.
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I'm reading a book called, 'Fear of Sunlight'. By Gladys Knight.
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The glove puppeteers Union is going on strike. They've just had a show of hands.
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I just used the vcuum clener on my keybord. Brillint!.
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Guidelines, Information and Rules
Hi! To ensure that this is a great place for everyone to have a wondeful time, we have some rules. Breaking them might result in a suspension or permanent ban from the site.
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Jokes must be in text format, no emojis or linking allowed.
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As a measure to prevent spam and reposts, we are limiting the number of jokes a user can submit.
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If you post a NSFW image as meme, it must be tagged as NSFW.
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Do not repost from all time top list.
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Reposts and duplicate jokes are not allowed.
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Photographs, gifs and videos depicting nudity, sexual poses or acts, if censored
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Child Exploitation content
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As a measure to prevent spam, we are limiting the number of jokes a user can submit
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Content designed to intimidate a person or group by any means including, doxxing, murder or injury, rape, harrasment etc.
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