Sickipedia

Elon Musk bans rainbow flags from American classrooms. That is a bad business move. Most Tesla owners are benders.

Sarah Ferguson can no longer refer to herself as the Duchess of York. She has to return to her original title, 'The Hampshire Slapper'.

Prince Andrew told Virginia Giuffre, "My daughters are a little younger than you are", before having sex. "So I expect you to be more experienced", he added.

Taliban cuts off internet to prevent immorality - leaving Afghanistan cut off from the world. Gives them more time to fuck their 6-year-old wives.

I was buying my 4th house, and before I paid my property tax, I asked if the Rayner deal was still available. The bloke said, I'll ask you a few questions and we'll see if you qualify.... "Have you created trust funds for all your children to reduce your tax? Is everything in your Wife's name? Do you have a bank account in a tax-free haven?" Yes, yes and yes, I replied. Thank you, sir - nothing to pay today.

Trump taking over Gaza. The three new golf courses will have some interesting bunkers.

Nvidia shares dropped faster than Wayne Rooney's pants in a care home.

Besotted Oscar Pistorius's new life with his heiress lover. She hasn't taken a shit for three months.

Ah, beautiful Venice. Such a wonderful place to receive your final blowjob.

Mobility scooter rider, aged 105, dies after being hit by car while crossing the road in Norfolk. He had his whole life in front of him.