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oohmatron

Member since 7 years ago

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oohmatron

7 years ago-Other-Stupid-Post Rating : 0

I always carry a spare powerbank in case one goes flat. Then I can charge it back up ready to use on my phone.

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oohmatron

7 years ago-Illness and Mortality-Alcoholism-Post Rating : 4

Drinking non alcoholic lager is like having half a wank.

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oohmatron

7 years ago-TV-Film/Movie-Post Rating : 2

I always have to go for a piss during the adverts. I hate trying to sell diuretics on TV for a living!

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oohmatron

7 years ago-Illness and Mortality-Disability-Post Rating : -1

My cousin, from Norfolk, posted a picture of her newborn son on Facebook. It's got 3 thumbs. The photo got 80.

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oohmatron

7 years ago-Sex and Shit-Penis-Post Rating : 0

I asked my transgender surgeon, "Is removing my penis difficult?" "No, don't panic, I'll pull it off."

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oohmatron

7 years ago-Other-Stupid-Post Rating : -1

I'm hoping for an 'A' Sun in my Astrology exam.

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oohmatron

7 years ago-Crime-Paedophilia-Post Rating : 0

Looking back most of my school friends were paedophiles.

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oohmatron

7 years ago-Sex and Shit-Disgusting-Post Rating : 0

There's a lot of perverted women with shoe fetishes out there, wearing knicker cameras. To be honest I don't mind as they usually have the camera facing the wrong way.

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oohmatron

7 years ago-Illness and Mortality-Blindness-Post Rating : 0

I'm not seeing a women I'm seeing from the 'going blind club'

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oohmatron

7 years ago-Crime-Animal Cruelty-Post Rating : 0

My wife was furious when she found spunk in her hair. "fucking hell love, it's only a rabbit, calm down."

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