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onlyme

Member since 8 years ago

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About Me

Just a normal bloke doing normal stuff living a normal life, interspersed with bouts of laughter when I see a fat kid drop an ice cream.

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UK

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onlyme

8 years ago-Sex and Shit-Fat-Post Rating : 0

What's fat, ginger and pregnant? Nothing.

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onlyme

8 years ago-Other-Animals-Post Rating : 0

I took the shell of my racing snail to try and improve its performance. Seemed to just make it more sluggish.

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onlyme

8 years ago-Other-Children-Post Rating : 3

When I was a boy we didn't have things like ADHD. We just called them council house kids.

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onlyme

8 years ago-Other-Children-Post Rating : 0

I had to jump through so many hoops to prove I was safe to work with children before I became a scout leader. Waste of time. There weren't even any sexy ones in the group.

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8 years ago-Sex and Shit-Paedophile-Post Rating : 0

I still think it's sad what happened to Jimmy Savile. I remember the time he fixed it for me to milk a cow blindfolded

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onlyme

8 years ago-Racism-Black-Post Rating : 0

I try really hard not to be racist at home but it's difficult when my socks only go missing on the washing machines coloureds setting

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onlyme

8 years ago-Racism-African-Post Rating : 0

It annoys me when people claim I am racist. Our home life has improved hugely since we purchased our negro

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onlyme

8 years ago-Sex and Shit-Beastiality-Post Rating : 0

(Old but worth having on the new site!) I cant believe I have been struck off the medical register just for sleeping with one of my patients. 5 years medical training completely wasted. The veterinary council are arseholes.

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onlyme

8 years ago-Sex and Shit-Ugly-Post Rating : 0

I was such an ugly baby that when my parents put me up for adoption, the RSPCA turned up to collect me.

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8 years ago-Wordplay-Children-Post Rating : 0

Some wanker just threw a bottle of Omega 3 tablets at me, luckily my injuries were only super fish oil

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