Sickipedia

Thoughts go out my Mother-in-law. She's been taken to hospital after a bee landed on her face Luckily she wasn't stung as I was too quick with the spade.

Played the best Doctors and Patients with the wife on the weekend. - made her sit quietly in the waiting room for 2 hours.

Breaking news : Norway has just completed painting barcodes on their entire fleet of war ships. So now, when returning to port, they can... Scandinavian.

People are so judgmental about breast feeding in public. Many are saying horrible things like "You shouldn't do that here", "You're not a woman" and "That's not even a baby!"

When you enquire about someone's name, you are really just asking what noise to make to get their attention.

So have scientists tested exploding all foods to see if they taste better or did they just stop when they got to corn?

Dad's Dating Tips #22: Never ask her where she wants to eat. Instead, ask her to guess which restaurant you are taking her to, then book that. #winnerwinner

A lot of women actually turn into good drivers. So, if you're a good driver, watch out for women turning.

Me: Where's my wallet? Brain: Location services unavailable Me: What time am I supposed to be there? Brain: Calendar not available, but here's the chorus of a really crap song from 1983 that will repeat in your head ALL DAY.

As a keen competitor on the series, everything was going great on My Kitchen Rules until I shared the ingredients of my tossed salad.