Sickipedia

Harry and Meghan are moving to Africa. Good thinking Phil, exile the ginger bastard and the niglet to Africa. If he doesn't burn to death from the African sun you can always say they were eaten by Zulus. Much more believable than chased into a concrete wall by paparazzi.

I've heard Easter celebrations are going off with a bang in Sri Lanka

"I'm a Firestarter! Fucking Cremator!" I sang as I shoved Keith Flint's body into the oven.

It's warm today but I didn't realise it was that warm, one of those wax dummies has a melted face. Oh nevermind, it's just Katie Piper!

People may wonder how a muslim man will know what his future wife will look like if they all wear burkas. But it's pretty easy, she looks just like the rest of the women in his family.

"A vegan woman said she was left ‘shaken’ when she accidentally ate beef served to her at a Wetherspoons in Cambridge. Chloe Sparks took just one bite of her ‘five bean chilli’ before realising something was wrong. She was so horrified at having eaten meat that she says she ended up making herself sick in the pub toilet." (sometimes the jokes just write themselves)

"Muslims forced to drink alcohol and eat pork in China’s ‘re-education’ camps, former inmate claims" Free beer and bacon butties?!?! Fuck, someone get me a koran and plane ticket to China!!

Why a white background? The last time someone's retinas burned this much they were in Nagasaki.

They say that Jews have the highest average IQ of the various peoples on Earth. Makes sense. All the dumb ones got caught and sent to Poland.

Early estimates are in from the Venezuela earthquake, authorities believe it has caused millions of dollars worth of improvements.