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I bought a porn DVD today and all I could see was a dark image of some fat cunt sitting there holding his cock. Then I realised the telly wasn't on.
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My moods: I'm too tired for this shit. I'm too old for this shit. I'm too sober for this shit. I don't have time for this shit.
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My girlfriend broke up with me today because she say's I'm crazy. I'm starting to regret all the effort I put into protecting her from the king of the potato people.
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They have the best drinking games in Africa. Like "Last one to find water dies."
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One of my mates is transgender. He used to be a dick but now he's a complete cunt.
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Please be careful on the roads tonight. Lots of people are drinking excessively and letting their wives drive.
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Yesterday my daughter was playing in the garden when I saw her kill a butterfly, so to teach her a lesson I said, "Just for that, you don't get any butter for a month." Today in the kitchen, she killed a cockroach. I said, "Nice try."
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I was blessed with a 9 inch penis. That priest is in jail now.
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How do you get a gay man to fuck a woman? Shit in her cunt.
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I hate it when people ask me if I'm drunk or on drugs. You don't need alcohol or drugs to have fun. But yes I am, actually.
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Guidelines, Information and Rules
Hi! To ensure that this is a great place for everyone to have a wondeful time, we have some rules. Breaking them might result in a suspension or permanent ban from the site.
01-
Jokes must be in text format, no emojis or linking allowed.
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As a measure to prevent spam and reposts, we are limiting the number of jokes a user can submit.
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If you post a NSFW image as meme, it must be tagged as NSFW.
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Do not repost from all time top list.
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No posting personal information.
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Reposts and duplicate jokes are not allowed.
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Photographs, gifs and videos depicting nudity, sexual poses or acts, if censored
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Child Exploitation content
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As a measure to prevent spam, we are limiting the number of jokes a user can submit
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Content designed to intimidate a person or group by any means including, doxxing, murder or injury, rape, harrasment etc.
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Meta posts are not allowed, however you can contact admin or a moderator.
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