Sickipedia

Lads, make your wife or girlfriend know how you feel walking around shops with her, by making her sit through you trying to pick a video on Pornhub...

I don’t think the Scousers will stick to the rules of their Lockdown... Maybe it would be a good idea to put some fencing up...I mean, what’s the worst that could happen?

"Do you have any change for a cup of tea?" "Yeah, try coffee."

Greta Thunberg: "How dare you; you have destroyed my future." I'm pretty sure your chromosomes are what have done that...

I'm sick of Mosquitos biting me so I've stabbed myself with a load of used needles I found outside a gay bar... Haha try it now; Josh is too smart for you little fuckers.

I’m part of the ‘Magic circle’... Basically, I’m friends with the Royal family and rape kids and somehow magically get away with it.

Shocking news out of the Royal Family... A nigger that actually wants to ‘leave’ the fucking country.

Boris is at number 10... Hopefully he'll learn to count past that very soon.

How annoying is it when someone breaks up with their boyfriend/girlfriend, and say: "'single life is great'...I could get used to this?" Have you forgot the first 16 years of your life? Or was your uncle a little more touchy-feely than most?

According to my wife, I helped cure her Nymphomania... Bitch.