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When parents support different football teams, it's funny how their offspring turn out. I knew a bloke who's father supported Liverpool and mum supported Urawa Red diamonds. In the morning he would steal a car, and then in the afternoon he would return it to the owner. I also knew a bloke who's dad supported Lazio and mother supported Maccabi Tel Aviv. When he got out of bed he would do a Nazi salute, and in the afternoon he would stick his head in the gas oven. Another bloke had an old man who supported Manchester United, and an old dear who supported FC St. Pauli. All day long he would be an utter cunt.
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Some football club nicknames are really apt. Sheffield United are The Blades because of the city's historical fame for steel production. Chelsea are The Blues due to their home strip being mainly blue. Manchester United are The Red Devils because supporting them is hell.
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An utter clown as prime minister at No.10. The Tories, in their wisdom, respond by electing a black woman as their leader. Maybe, the recent heatwave wasn't caused by an area of high pressure which became blocked over the UK leading to a sustained south-easterly air flow. Maybe it was caused by the friction from Nigel Farage rubbing his hands together.
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I hate people who say it is what it is. Of course it is what it is. I mean it isn't it is what it isn't is it?
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Giving Sadiq Khan the title 'Sir' is like giving Tommy Robinson the title 'Ayatollah'.
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Inna Min. Was a chink I went to school with. He was always procrastinating.
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After nine months of intensive training, ultra competitive league and cup games, and not to mention the gruelling international schedule; it's good that the top players have the opportunity in the summer to have a blow out.
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Liverpool hasn't seen this many hits since The Beatles.
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I went on a date from my new dating app. "What type of therapist are you?" she said. "Why do you think I'm a therapist?" I replied. "It's your name on the dating app!" she declared. "Oh shit" I said, "I forgot to put a space between 'e' and 'r'.
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I hate all of this fucking woke colour-blind casting on TV and in films with niggers playing white people. We've had Anne Boleyn, Ariel, and now even Robbie Williams.
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