Sickipedia

It's high time Britain changed the national anthem from "God save the Queen" Asking a non-existent entity to rescue someone who has never had a moment's peril in her life just makes us all look silly.

Every time I open a bottle of wine, I try and let it breathe. But it never does. So I immediately give it some mouth to mouth resuscitation.

I was just about to eat my fish supper and watch the lion king when I noticed my black flat mate had used all the condiments Oh well A coon ate my tartar!

Dozens killed in a stampede at Qasem Soleimani funeral...... The gift that keeps on giving!

When I was a child, I remember lying with my eyes closed waiting for Santa to come. Then there was the awkward silence as he got dressed and left.

I've done a hundred pull ups today..... This new belt is crap!

Ladbrokes Coral fined after customer lost £98,000 Staff claim they tried to stop him betting on Liverpool to win the premier league title but he just kept saying "it's our year!"

Religion: Giving people hope in a world torn apart by religion.

The pope argues that absinence is the best form of contraception and is 100% effective. Try telling that to Mary.

Scientists are now saying that the Brontosaurus may never have existed. Apparently the Triceratops and the Stegosaurus are also very questionable. I'm gutted, because it means that my pyjamas are just meaningless.