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I was at my girlfriend's house last night and we started kissing and cuddling. Then as I lay on the bed, she started stripping. At the sight of her stunning body, I almost came in my pants. A personal best for me seeing as they were 20 yards away on the landing!
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Mohammed from next door called me there, telling me he got a threatening letter in his mail this morning, poor cunt was scared stiff... ....turns out it was a £1.50 off dove soap coupon.
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Before you laugh at children who believe in Father Christmas, remember, there are adults who still believe in Ole Gunnar Solskjaer...
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I tried to light vapes fart earlier but his fart was a squirty one and put out the flame, his pants got a bit wet though but the juice was worth the squeeze
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Sometimes you just cant win i thought i would be a gentleman and hold the door open for a young lady 2 mins later she said " will you Fuck off i am trying to have a shit"
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What do you get if you mix human DNA and whale DNA? Kicked out of Sea world.
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Guidelines, Information and Rules
Hi! To ensure that this is a great place for everyone to have a wondeful time, we have some rules. Breaking them might result in a suspension or permanent ban from the site.
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Jokes must be in text format, no emojis or linking allowed.
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As a measure to prevent spam and reposts, we are limiting the number of jokes a user can submit.
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If you post a NSFW image as meme, it must be tagged as NSFW.
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Do not repost from all time top list.
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Metaposts are not allowed. If you've something to ask then please go to forum.
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No posting personal information.
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Reposts and duplicate jokes are not allowed.
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Photographs, gifs and videos depicting nudity, sexual poses or acts, if censored
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Child Exploitation content
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As a measure to prevent spam, we are limiting the number of jokes a user can submit
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Content designed to intimidate a person or group by any means including, doxxing, murder or injury, rape, harrasment etc.
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Meta posts are not allowed, however you can contact admin or a moderator.
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Promoting false information
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