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clever

Member since 8 years ago

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I'm sick

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clever

8 years ago-Sex and Shit-Gay

What's brown and sticky? Elton John's wedding ring.

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I developed a splitting headache and a feeling of nausea that wouldn't go away, I thought I'd contracted Ebola. Turns out it was just the next door neighbours playing the new U2 album

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What do you get when you insert human DNA into a goat? Banned from the petting zoo.

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When I die I want Justin Bieber to play at my funeral just so that my death is not the worst thing to happen to people that day.

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Did you hear about the Irish man who walked out of a bar?

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I'm writing this in a new font I've invented, that can only be read by idiots.

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clever

8 years ago-Other-One Liner

I'm going to write a book on xenophobia, with pictures in it so Americans can enjoy it too.

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clever

8 years ago-Racism-American

Scientists in America say they have just discovered signs of intelligent life. It said "Mexican Border 5 Miles".

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I had this girl the other night and by the way she was responding to my caresses, I could have sworn she was conscious.

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The traffic warden said, "You can't park there, it's reserved for the disabled". I said, "Fuck off you cunt, I've got Tourette's".

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