Sickipedia

Nasa plans to put a woman on the moon by 2024. It would have been 2022 but they need two more years to develop an automatic gearbox for the lunar rover.

Life’s full of questions, like why does my parcel always come as soon as I take a shit

My son came in the other day and asked me what love juice is. I thought I'd try and put it as delicately as possible. "Well son love juice is to do with sex, you must know a bit from school? Anyway when you're with a girl and your having a kiss and a cuddle and you touch the old breasts you get a woody, but you call it a hard on when you're an adult. Now girls they don't get a hard on they have a form of lubrication for the penis. What you do is play with the little beak on the vagina for a bit and when its lubricated you put your fingers in and you can hear it a bit like when mum is mixing up an omelette, you can see it too glistening and on your fingers like little heartstrings, like sticky mirrors. Now the vagina is ready to accept the penis and then get the sperm to the uterus and then make a baby, that my son is what love juice is. But tell me son what have you been watching?" "Tennis"

So Jake murdering bastard Davison identified as an incel which stands for involuntary celibate, fuck me I think I’m an incel too being married 20 years. Closest I’ve got to a shag in a year is when the doctor checked out my phimosis.

Alan prayed everyday for 40 days and 40 nights, for many days his prayers went unanswered, he cursed god called him a cunt and then forgave him and prayed some more then finally on the fortieth day his prayers were finally answered, sickipedia was finally loading right and he could see all his favourite jokes about pakis, spics, jews, niggers, wogs, chinks, sambos, monkeys, retards, spastics , Dianne abbott and all those crap gary haggerty memes some sad cunt keeps uploading. Ps. thanks sicki team for finally fixing your servers.

How do you blindfold a Chinese person? Put floss over their eyes.

What do you call an Indian lesbian? Minjeeta

Check it out guys I just found a list of every known gender. MALE FEMALE

How to react to the Barcelona van attack on social media for liberals: Step 1: post a status saying pray for Barcelona or #pray for Barcelona Step 2: change your picture to the Spanish flag Step 3: attend a candlelit vigil and take a selfie of you there saying #pray for Barcelona Step 4: insist islam is a religion peace and say its nothing to do with them being muslim Yeah that'll show them bastard terrorists!

Hi guys just found my wife dead so I need some advice: what gas mark do I cook a lasagne at and how long for?