Sickipedia

For sale;10 used condoms....no weirdos.

Taylor Swift. Her music may be shit but she can knock you up a suit in less than an hour.

I like my women how i like my elected government.I take what i get,they're all the fucking same anyway.

There's TV programme i can't remember the name of,the theme tune goes -Sunday Monday,something something,Tuesday Wednesday,something something,Thursday Friday,something something,Saturday..and so on.If someone can help with this i'll have a happy day.

Casey Stunt. I went to school with her. Lovely girl, hated spoonerisms.

I got myself a new black coat hanger yesterday. I'll have to reduce the height of the coat hook though, this one isn't as tall.

My son fell asleep at a recent house party we had so I decided to shave one of his eyebrows off and draw a cock on his face. My wife went mental when she picked him up to change his nappy.

The hole punch was invented in 1886. And was banned from Boxing in 1887.

My wife told me she wants a spa day for her Christmas I'll tell her it's pronounced 'spade' when I give it to her next week.

I've had enough of Christmas. All year long I work my fucking fingers to the bone to buy all the presents that my kids ask for. And what happens Christmas morning? That fat fucker with a beard gets all the credit! Still I suppose it's my fault for marrying her.