Sickipedia

Aboriginal days of significance: 13/2 anniversary of the apology. 15/3 national close the gap day. 26/5 National sorry day. 27/5 anniversary of the referendum. 27/5-3/6 reconciliation week. 3/6 Mabo day. 1/7 coming to light. 8/7-15/7 NAIDOC week. 4/8 National aboriginal & torres straight Islander children’s day. 9/8 international day of the worlds indigenous people. 5/9 indigenous literacy day. 13/9 anniversary of the UN declaration on the rights of indigenous people. Yet people want the one day 26/1 Australia Day to be changed to be more inclusive. Isn’t Australia Day about exactly that: all Australians? Leave Australia Day alone you selfish stinky petrol sniffing cunts.

Why did the Australian invent a new stomach exercise? Because he wanted to be ab original.

There were the two young Aussie blokes who had arranged to meet down by the river to do a spot of fishing. One of them was running late, so his mate decided to start with out him. He was lying back on the riverbank, fishing, with his line in the water and the other end around his big toe. Beside him he had these little black pills and was idly flicking them into the air. Eventually, his mate came along. "G'day, where have you been?" the fisherman asked. "Had to do a couple of jobs for Dad. Hey, what are those little black pills you're throwing in the air?" "Ah, they're Smart Pills," the first bloke explained. "You oughta try some." "What do they do?" "They make you smarter." So the second bloke took one. After a while he said "They're not making me any smarter." "Well, take a handful." So the second bloke did. He chewed them up until he had black juice running all down his chin. Suddenly he stopped. "Hey, these black pills are just sheep shit!" he said. The fisherman laughed, "I told you they'd make you smarter."

New Zealanders have an Ardern for their Prime Minister.

My mate was telling me that he failed his exam in Aboriginal music. I said, "Didja redo it?" Credit A Lee

There apparently are cases of Corona virus from China in Australia. I thought Australians preferred Foster's over Coronas?

With all the bush fires in Australia, I find it strange that nobody's mentioned the indigenous people. I saw a video of some girls skipping through the flames with kangaroos and Malcom McLaren's Double Dutch instantly sprang to mind: 🎶 Hey Abo, Abo, Abonettes. 🎶

You little beauty Had a bit a brekkie this arvo and voted down you mongrels jokes

I've started a Facebook page for anyone interested in mutual fart lighting. There's also an advice web-site at www.KIMJONGTRUMP_is_a_cunt.com

The Queen's having to take a paycut over the next four years. She's also thinking about how the Royal family can cut costs by getting rid of stuff that they don't use anymore ... like Australia.