Sickipedia

This year my garden has become invested with bloody pigeons. I think it's an attempted coo.

Chinese state media have confirmed the safety of missing tennis player Peng Shuai, by releasing a video showing her happy and healthy. In the short clip, she also seen congratulating Andy Murray on his recent Wimbledon victory.

As a citizen of the West, I would like to plead with the people of the Middle East not to seek revenge for the assassination of Qasem Soleimani by attacking civilians of the US or its allies. We are not to blame for his death. But if you want to target the president who ordered the assassination, then please feel free.

The 17-year-old arrested for the murder of Elianne Andam hasn't been named. But I'm pretty certain we already know what colour he is.

So PC Wayne Couzens kidnapped, raped and murdered Sarah Everard, one of the most wicked and disgusting crimes in history. It takes a special kind of twisted and depraved cunt to do something like that. Anyone know what his username was on here?

I know this is a website for sick jokes but the abuse Harvey Price suffers is unacceptable. There’s no need to viciously attack people who are different. I was always raised to believe that if you don’t like someone, are embarrassed by them or think they’re a cunt, you should just ignore them - Dwight Yorke

This is a genuinely true story I thought my fellow sickipedians may enjoy. I got home from work the other day and my daughter, who is nearly 3, told me “Daddy, a coon stole all my stuffs”. Despite my personal enjoyment of sicki-style humour, this accusation came as something of a shock, so I asked her to repeat it. “A naughty coon stole all my stuff”. After some investigation, it turns out she’d been watching a cartoon featuring a thieving raccoon, and was role playing this with her siblings when I got home - clearly her speech is still developing. After some laughs with my wife, she suggested we correct her and make sure she includes the RA in future, but for comedy value I disagree!

I’ve just attended a training course to learn about the most effective way of creating tunnels. It was boring.

BBC News: Search for man overboard from cruise ship Fucking idiots. He's obviously in the sea.

"What is the difference between a Palestinian civilian and a Palestinian terrorist?" "I don't know?" "Perfect. Welcome to the Israel Defense Force".