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valefar

Member since 8 years ago

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valefar

4 months ago-Religion-Islam

When is salami toast? As of last night.

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The Titan captain's last words: "Don't worry about those noises; we made it through Nordstream and we'll make it through this, too."

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valefar

2 years ago-Other-Random

I found a new flat, so I packed all my things in unmarked boxes, dressed in a dark hoodie and shades, carried them down to a black van, then drove it all over to the new flat at three a.m. and unpacked. What can I say? I move in mysterious ways.

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I shagged a Navy girl last night. At least I guess she was a Navy girl; the moment I slipped her the pork, she said, "Welcome aboard."

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I've just had my first lesson in Haitian cuisine and it was easy. All you have to do is skewer some rats on a length of reebar then hold them over a burning tire till the hair burns off and they're crispy.

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The mods at Sickipedia are such good sports. I mean it. They really can take a joke,

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When I first joined The Flat Earth Society it had a small membership. I never imagined it would become a global movement.

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I've invented an outhouse that walks with legs and I call it the Dr. Fauci: It's full of shit and you never know where it will go next.

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I love blow jobs. It’s about the only time I get to see my wife’s mouth moving without having to listen to an incessant stream of nonsense.

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Money is no object.................but every woman is. Happy Women's History Month!

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