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Whoever has got my voodoo doll, can you give his cock a bit of a suck, please? Thanks.
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Jilly Cooper has died at the age of 88 following a fall. She fell into the arms of the Grim Reaper. His bony arms belied his strength as he cradled her like a timorous kitten. His eye sockets like unplumbed depths held her mesmerised as she felt her former life dropping away to be replaced by a hunger, a need, to be with him for all eternity. He leaned in as she arched her neck ready to receive his kiss. The kiss of Death. The kiss of Life. The only kiss that would ever matter to her again.
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Yo mama’s so ugly that when she gives me a blowjob it counts as anal.
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Just found a dead man in the street, so I have brought him in and put him on my cat's pillow. Lets see how it fucking likes it...
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Seeing a Man Utd match listed on BBC1 is a bit like seeing my mum in a porno. I'm disappointed but I'll still watch it.
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My daughter was thrilled to come home from the kid’s birthday party with some fruit-shaped helium balloons. But she cried later when I popped her cherry.
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What is the country coming to? Good quality porn, probably.
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I’ve still yet to meet someone with single sclerosis.
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I use special infrared cameras to track the development of beavers. I live next door to the local girls’ boarding school.
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Vladimir Putin says a ceasefire should "remove the underlying causes of this crisis". So he’s going to have himself shot, then?
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Guidelines, Information and Rules
Hi! To ensure that this is a great place for everyone to have a wondeful time, we have some rules. Breaking them might result in a suspension or permanent ban from the site.
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Jokes must be in text format, no emojis or linking allowed.
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As a measure to prevent spam and reposts, we are limiting the number of jokes a user can submit.
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If you post a NSFW image as meme, it must be tagged as NSFW.
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Do not repost from all time top list.
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Metaposts are not allowed. If you've something to ask then please go to forum.
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No posting personal information.
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Reposts and duplicate jokes are not allowed.
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Photographs, gifs and videos depicting nudity, sexual poses or acts, if censored
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Child Exploitation content
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As a measure to prevent spam, we are limiting the number of jokes a user can submit
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Content designed to intimidate a person or group by any means including, doxxing, murder or injury, rape, harrasment etc.
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Meta posts are not allowed, however you can contact admin or a moderator.
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Promoting false information
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