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Dont Let The Bottom Fall Out Of Your World.Have A Vindaloo And Let The World Fall Out Of Your Bottom.
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I went to see the local priest today. I asked him to say a prayer for my ill mother-in-law. Apparently, they only do that if you want them to get better.
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Keir Starmer, "We all stand with the people of Liverpool." The last time I stood with the people of Liverpool I lost my fucking wallet.
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Christmas cake is basically the same as wedding cake, but without all the fucking misery.
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My wife got smacked in the face by a boomerang. I didn't throw it, I just hit her with it.
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I saw a big spider, so I went and got the hoover and sucked the cunt up. The owner of the reptile shop went fucking mental.
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I always thought my gran had really bad piles because of the way she walks. Turns out she just loves anal.
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I use to love my grans homemade bread. Then she told me where she got the yeast from.
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I stand firm with Israel. War always give me an erection.
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What did one Muslim say to another Muslim? I don't know, I don't speak the language. But I reckon it was something to do with fucking goats, though.
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If you want to smack your kids, but not leave a mark. I find a good quality oven glove works best.
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As a measure to prevent spam and reposts, we are limiting the number of jokes a user can submit.
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As a measure to prevent spam, we are limiting the number of jokes a user can submit
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