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If blind people wear sunglasses, then why don’t deaf people wear earmuffs?
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France, if they’re our migrants, then they’re also our fucking fish you snail eating cunts
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Gareth Thomas - the first ever rugby player to get a cauliflower arse
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Just been to the chippy, and asked for a small portion of chips. “75 or 99?” asked the girl serving me “Fuck me” I said, “if you’re going to count them I’ll have a pie”
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Today a man knocked on my door and asked a small donation for the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.
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Harvey Price is tipping the scales at nearly 29 stone, due to a condition called Prader-Willi syndrome. As opposed to his mum, who has Suckany-Willi syndrome
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I’ve started going out with a ginger haired girl. I thought she had a Brazilian but it turns out she’d just stuck a fish finger on her fanny
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I’m going to start calling my wife “Watford” because she kicks off every ten minutes
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Sorry to hear that the village fete has been cancelled. My deepest tombolances.
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I hate my stutter. I got into a taxi yesterday and asked to go to Chester. I ended up in fucking Chichester
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Hi! To ensure that this is a great place for everyone to have a wondeful time, we have some rules. Breaking them might result in a suspension or permanent ban from the site.
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As a measure to prevent spam, we are limiting the number of jokes a user can submit
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