Sickipedia

Congratulations Cambridgeshire police. Within 8 minutes of the 999 call, they had found two coloured people to arrest.

Trump said his Gaza plan could be the greatest day in history. Clearly he has never had two snickers bars drop at once in a vending machine.

The Charlie Kirk killer was perched on the top of a building a few hundred yards away and shot him in the side of the head. I wonder where he got the inspiration for that from.

We need to get rid of all these people coming over in small boats. We should provide them with a fernicular from the coast and, if we have learnt anything from Germany, showers. If all else fails, we should put them into American primary schools.

No one would have died on the funicular if it were in England They would have died on the rail replacement bus service.

The UK police are looking for someone who abuse a young boy in a tent near Loch Ness, described as white, bald, 30-50 and 5’ 10”. That is not right. I am nearly 6’

I was really saddened to hear of that kid killed by a falling tree. What a waste of a 7 year old girl.

For what happened in Liverpool, I blame Ford. This would never have happened if they hadn’t fitted their Ford Galaxy cars with accelerator pedals

The news: Pakistani is bombing India and killing Indians. In retaliation, India is bombing Pakistan and killing Pakistanis. But first, the bad news.

Girls in Taliban ruled Pakistan should have the right to an education. I suggest a full curriculum of cooking, cleaning and practical sex education