Sickipedia

The Queen has emailed all members of the Royal Family asking them to take a spade to Prince Philips funeral to help dig the grave. Prince Harry replied saying "her names Meghan, if you don't mind"

This Indian Covid variant is so bad It's wiped out half the staff at my local takeaway. Next week in memory of them, the menu will contain Naan Dead, Papa Gone and Chicken Bury Auntie.

I've just bought one of them rape alarms, it's small, easily concealed, very loud, sadly the slags keep hearing me coming behind them now and running off.

I see that the comedian Gary Delaney is married to "Comedienne" Sarah Millican, which technically makes his cock the funniest thing that's ever came out of her mouth

Bloke in a wheelchair rolls upto an ice cream van and asks for an ice cream, "raspberry ripple?" asks the ice cream man, the wheelie replies "yeah I am, but I still want an ice cream"

My local pub have been advertising a George Michael tribute night for ages, imagine my surprise when I was thrown out after 5 minutes for spunking over a photo of him

Some famous old actor and dancer has died, I can't remember his name.. Give Us A Clue

A KKK guy walks into a bar in the deep south and there's a black guy working behind the bar. "SERVE ME NIGGER" , says Mr KKK, the black fella says your "not allowed to say that now" and the KKK man says " OK sell me some beer nigger"

Paul Sinha from The Chase has reinvented his self for a new career as a cross dressing Stone Roses tribute act named Sally Sinhaman.

As a tribute to Emad Al Swealmeen the Liverpool Infirmary Bomber, the Editors have re released their classic song. Smokers Outside The Hospital Door