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'Virgin needs money' Usually something I see in the back pages of Razzle.
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I don't know how much longer I can keep getting out of bed at the crack of 5:30pm.
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Episodes of Fawlty Towers being pulled, bands changing their names. What's next, is vinegar going to be renamed vi?
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All I've seen on the news for the last 2 years is wildfires, flooding, Covid-19 and Black Lives Matter. Am I the only one still fighting the scourge of plastic drinking straws?
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I got arrested for having sex with a girl who was under 16. ...Celsius
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Tonight I'm holding a cheese and wine party for all my friends. Because my only friends are mice and fruit flies.
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Man shot dead by Police after stabbing 3 people to death. It's sickening, just typical police brutality and stereotyping of the middle eastern male covered in blood. We should hold a protest!
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I got caught in a prostitution sting. I fucked a prostitute and now my dick stings when I piss.
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My Chinese neighbours are crapping out the window like they do every Thursday at 8pm.
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I was trying to catch a Leprechaun when he had a cerebral haemorrhage. That was a stroke of luck.
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