Sickipedia

I took my mother-in-law out yesterday morning Being a sniper is fucking awesome!

I just went for a cappuccino in Costa, The barista asked, "do you want sprinkles?" I said "yes please".........and now I'm stuck with her incontinent cat !!!!....

We're so skint in our house, my wife sold one of her kidneys to pay for the kids new school uniform ...... If things get any worse, I'll have to cancel Sky Sports ......

Just found out that 'Niamh' is pronounced 'Neve' Unbeliamhable

Just been watching the ladies beach volley ball and there has already been a bad wrist injury. I should be ok by the morning though........

I remember taking my lad to the pub for the 1st time. Bought him a pint of stout, didn't like it so I drank it, pint of lager, same thing, cider, same. Got us shots, the ungrateful shit made me have em all. Finally we left. How the fuck I got the pushchair home I'll never know.

I really wanted to get fit so I bought a push bike. I got half a mile down the road and it threw me off breaking my nose and gave me some nasty cuts and bruises. So I give up and went back to beer and burgers for a week. Then got back on the bike and same thing happened again. This went on for about 2 months I am starting to think it's just a vicious cycle.

Roses are red, So is bacon, Poems are hard, Bacon

1 in 4 people apparently suffer from denial. Not me though.

I watched a whale washing up on the beach today I couldn't believe the size of the tea towel