Sickipedia

Hallo, friends, I am a visitor to this site (old, newer and sparkling new version) of many years’ standing. I am older and don’t know much about how trolling has changed since the Three Billy Goats Gruff (still on YouTube, by Frank Luther)! I’m like the chap who posted a few weeks back: I don’t have clever jokes for you, but I chuckle at the witticisms some of you guys are kind enough to post (thank you for doing so!). But I do sincerely wish that, before I find the jokes, I did not have to trawl through a load of crude comments and insults that people are chucking about. Whether it is bullying or banter, whether someone is cheating on points is immaterial: it’s boring for the rest of us. I cannot and will not judge who is right or wrong. But, very politely, please have mercy on the rest of us, let's start afresh and stop the personal stuff on this site now. ALL of it, whether you are the goodies or the baddies! And is the lighting of farts funny even the first time? I aspire to no fame on the Leader Board. This humble request is my first and last posting. Thanks for reading it to the end (and please let others do the same)!

Conservative leadership vote: Sir John Major said he could not vote for someone who had "misled the country" and the UK needed a "serious leader for serious times". Does he mean we should not listen to anyone who misled the country by preaching about "family values" whilst bonking Edwina Curry silly behind his wife's back?

"Rail firm fined £1m after man died leaning out of train window." The warning notice was one of four "cluttered" notices. The adult avid train enthusiast had no idea that might be dangerous? "The judge said there was also no-one on train to monitor use of window." The evil train company apparently didn't have employees guarding 4 windows per carriage. Also note: if you lie down on the A38 it may affect your health. But do evil councils put up notices every 5 yards warning you? Do they hell! My opinion? Born a dildo, die a dildo.

Tony Blair: "Election before Brexit is 'an elephant trap'". This is the man who, in government, would not let the people vote on Iraq or on Europe because they could not be trusted to vote the "correct" way. Does he now want to avoid a general election, because the people won't vote the "correct" remainer way? Some of us are old-fashioned enough still to regard a general election as the ultimate form of democracy. Anyway, with that level of judgement, I wouldn't put money on Tony to trap an elephant in London Zoo.

According to Tony Bliar an election now "under our system delivers a comfortable Tory majority" (and therefore we shouldn't have one!!!). Cos the voters will get it wrong again (like in the referendum). Forgive me for daring to ask, but who was that long serving Labour leader and Prime Minister who did nothing to promote proportional representation, but rather fought against the idea? He does seem to have gone off democracy in a big way. I wonder if he is harbouring dreams of being our new Lord Protector? It went well last time we had one, didn't it! The question is: just who is losing his head?

It's gonna be great playing catch-up, going through all the postings when the memes section starts working again. I wonder if it'll be this year. Anyone still remember how to get things running under Windows98? It seems someone could do with a helping hand.

With what sadness I noted the news that Rory Stewart is to reduce the number of undemocratic remoaners in parliament by standing down at the next election. On a completely separate matter, I believe there may be a zoo in the United Kingdom which would welcome one of the rare fourth species of orangutan. Or maybe someone would like a pet that can almost talk?

BBC: "Ginger Baker had an expensive polo habit". He must have been the only rock musician addicted to the mint-with-a-hole, rather than heroin and cocaine!

Women's rights in Wales could be hit by Brexit, according to an "expert", who also expresses the opinion that "women are always at the bottom of the ladder." I wonder on which planet she has been living the last forty years, whilst so much has changed for the better. And I wonder if - JUST POSSIBLY? - this is the last throes of the desperate Project Fear propaganda peddled by the remainer camp. Not funny-haha, but certainly funny-strange.

BBC News: "Essex lorry deaths: Vigil for Vietnamese victims". I dunno. I had to read his fucking Aeneid Book One at school. I really don't think those Vietnamese need any more punishment!!! (I fear I may have a "nobody understands me" experience here!)