Sickipedia

My boss said he's going to fire everyone with bad posture. I have a hunch it might be me.

I might have a slight drinking problem..... My wife asked me to toast some bread for her..... I raised my wine glass and said "here's to bread"

Im just echoing the top post today about all the bickering. im not doing it to get points, i couldnt care less about points, i have a life. but come on, lets just keep adding jokes, good jokes, and if you like them, then vote them up, regardless of who posted it. all this bickering shit just ruins the excellent site. i visit this page every day to have a laugh, once in a blue moon i will post a joke i like, but thats rare. i prefer to read them and have a laugh. cant we all just be friends? btw, I fucked your mum.

I hate being bi-polar, it's awesome!

To all those who believe in telekinesis................. raise my hand!

Just want to say thanks to the person who explained the meaning of the word 'many' to me. It means a lot.

A Russian couple were strolling down the street in Moscow, when the husband felt a drop hit his nose. 'I think it's starting to rain,' he said to his wife. 'I don't think so, it felt more like snow to me,' she replied. 'No, I'm sure it was just rain, he said.' Well, as these things go, they were about to have a major argument about whether it was raining or snowing. Just then they saw a minor communist party official walking toward them. 'Let's not fight about it,' the man said, 'let's ask the Comrade whether it's officially raining or snowing.' As the official approached, the husband stopped him and asked, 'Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officially raining or snowing?' 'It's raining, of course,' he answered and walked on. But the woman insisted: 'I know that felt like snow!' To which the man quietly replied: 'Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!'

I got a broken drum for Christmas; it's a present you can't beat.

On payday each Friday I like to take £100 out of my bank account and see how many days I can last on it. My record is 4 so far......................hours

I have OCD. Or, as i call it, CDO. I like to have things in alphabetical order, no idea why....................