Sickipedia

Mary had a little tortoise That was big and bold He never saw Liverpool win the league Cos he's only a hundred years old

UEFA MENS PLAYER OF THE YEAR Virgil Van Dickhead.

Heard about the new '96 challenge?' It's for scousers, to see if they can go a full 24 hours without mentioning 'Hillsborough' to anyone. No one has completed it yet!

Looks like it really is Liverpool's year!

I bought a DVD documentary called, "Hillsborough: The Disaster"... ...I've just sat through an hour and a half of footage of Liverpool fans screaming as they were crushed or trampled to death, and watched the aftermath as bodies were lay out on the pitch and fellow Scousers ripped down advertising hoardings as inadequate makeshift stretchers. I'm guessing that the disaster must be on disc two.

Thomas Cook have announced that over 21,000 people will lose their jobs. No scousers are affected by this.

I see the liverpool fans have plenty of flares tonight! Keeping up tradition then as when they last won the league every fucker was wearing them!

So Des is dead, thank fuck he wasn't from Liverpool, we're gonna hear enough shit about Ray Clemence.

Been great to see Liverpool fc adhering to the coronavirus rules by not celebrating any goals in the last few games. Keep up the good work 👏

Dog owner: "I got this new dog and have been teaching it a few tricks" Me: "Tell me what tricks it does then" Dog owner: Ok, when liverpool lose in the league it sits down, then when liverpool draw in the league it rolls over. Me: What does it do when liverpool win? Dog owner: Don't know, I've only had him 6 weeks.