Sickipedia

"Puddles" is a cute little pet name I've given the missus recently. She has Pulmonary Edema.

China Flu, China Flu. What're those chinks tryna do? Feel the heat fill your head? Have a cough? BAM, you're dead. Look out! Here comes the China Flu!

Visit Afghanistan. You never know where you'll beheaded.

I've come to the conclusion that Conor McGregor is a Highlander. He's called Conor, he's from Ireland and he's rather boisterous and braggadocious. So he's Conor MickLoud. No, YOU fuck off.

Life for a Chinese rapist must be confusing. Never knowing which kind of raw dog you want.

The BBC will soon be filming a programme where four 20 year old men compete to see how many different prostitutes they can visit with only £300. Bargain Cunt airs in December.

Sex is a lot like the US Military. Pull out at the wrong time and you'll waste 20 years and shit load of money. (Not mine)

I've heard from many sources that I never miss a beat. Might explain why so many of my exes were in shelters.

The owner of doomed alpaca Geronimo has vowed to film every moment of his killing. Finally, some decent wank material.

Kathy Griffin has announced on social media that she is cancer. We knew that already Kat. Ohhh... I appear to have misread...