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jo3n

Member since 8 years ago

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bigzav

member since 8 years ago

cupidfuckingstunt

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hockey

member since 7 years ago

garystockman1

member since 7 years ago

My son came running in the house shouting, "DADDY, do farts have lumps." "Why no son, why do you ask?" "I think I just shit my pants."

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Having a mobile makes it really easy to cheat on my wife. My son stands behind her and texts me what cards she's got in her hand.

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7 years ago-Crime-Murder

My buddy asked, "Do you think someday you'll ever be famous?" "Maybe." I replied,"If the find the bodies."

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7 years ago-Other-Family

Tonight a friend asked if he could crash on my couch. I had to explain to him I was married now and that's where I sleep.

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7 years ago-Funny-blonde

I like to sneak up behind horses. It's how I get my kicks.

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7 years ago-Wordplay-Children

What's the difference between herpes and mononucleosis? you get one from snatching a kiss.

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I planted Emo grass in my lawn.... It cuts it's self.

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Porn gives young people an unhealthy and unrealistic idea of how quickly a plumber will come to your house.

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I can tell people are judgmental just by looking at them.

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6 years ago-Wordplay-Children

I can't stand those people that pound on your door and tell you how you need to be "saved" or you'll "burn" Pushy firemen.

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