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jimmyseville

Member since 8 years ago

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My Chinese girlfriends baby nice made me a present at school and it's just arrived in the post. Needed to upgrade my iPhone anyway

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Guns don't kill people Mentally ill Americans with guns do

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Guns don't kill people Mentally ill Americans with guns do

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You don't need to tell me me that smoking when pregnant can be dangerous. When my little boy started kicking, he used to knock the ashtray clean off my girlfriend's tummy! He's still paying for the new carpet out of his pocket money..

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Why did Hannah cross the road? To steal the joke from the chicken to post on sickipedia 20 times

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That saying “you are what you eat” is so true! By the time I’d opened a packet of ready to eat chicken bites, I was ready to eat chicken bites! # stolen from live at the bbc

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Is it still officially a Royal Wedding if neither are the products of incest? Or Royal ?

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I'd also want to mass murder people if I wasn't allowed beer or bacon

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Dear Hannah My condolences on Keith Chegwin dying. On the plus side, I hear Les Dennis's Twitter feed has a few jokes you can steal instead. Bury you later

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I did a shit this morning that was so brown and smelly, that it tried to escape Libya on a punctured li-lo

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