Sickipedia

I was sacked from the funeral home for playing The Mexican Hat Dance. Turns out the relatives wanted sombre music, not sombrero

Apparently kirk was shot while at a university while talking about guns. Wow coronation street has gone bleak. Although if his sister Maria needs consoling I will be the first to offer

Alli Money Absolute cunt of a bloke Stole my money and robbed my house right after my wife left me

If a tree falls on a child and no-one is around to hear. Do the mccans start getting ideas?

Got called in to hr at work for saying I heard the new girl looked like one of the monkees And then i saw her race Credit to whoever started these. Not the best but a work in progress.

RIP Uriah Rennie

Bbc news: death penalty calls for white British man who deliberately drove in to crowds in Liverpool. In other news lovely young group of Pakistani choir school immigrants asked to apologise after accidently drugging and raping school girls

The judge earlier asked if I can describe the court artist. I said very sketchy.

Americans know it's spring when a groundhog tells them. British know it's summer when the police say they have new info on madelline mccan and must go to Portugal for 2 weeks

Only 2 things will survive after an apocalypse when everything is dead and stops working. Cockroaches and wasps "jokes" appearing on sickipedia