Sickipedia

Recently bought a cheap Logitech controller to control my Titan submarine. Not usually into cutting corners, but it's working fine so fa.....

What do Angela Rayner and a Tampax have in common? They are both stuck up cunts.

Recently saw an advert on TV for NatWest. The whole call centre was full of blacks and asians. On a positive note, at least it shows that they are based in the UK and not abroad.

BBC presenter involved in sexual photo scandal finally revealed. Huw'd thought it...!

Named and shamed BBC presenter shits on wife and family over 3 years in secret. Gets found out. His excuse is ooh, it's my mental health, best get to hospital. Huw convenient...

Just opened a pack of Jelly Babies for my kids. Dipped my hand in the bag to have some and one of the black fuckers nicked my watch!

I have a fetish lately for getting my mower out and cutting the grass. Now I can't help noticing how sexy some of the neighbours front gardens are. I'm going to start a website called LawnHub... Fuck off, I'll get my lawn mower...

Just watched the latest Virgin Galactic launch on TV. I noticed two monkeys on the mission to space. Surprised the media didn't pick up on that if I'm honest.

Just watching some NFL live on TV out of curiosity. It's wank. They seem to stop every 2 seconds. NFL must stand for Not Fucking Long, as in the amount of time they actually spend doing anything...

British man has eye stabbed in Paris terror attack. No idea how deep the blade went. I imagine he got an Eiffel at least...