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harry7695

Member since 6 years ago

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harry7695

5 years ago-Sex and Shit-Wife-Post Rating : 32

If marriage has taught me one thing in life, it's how to masturbate in bed without waking my wife up.

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harry7695

4 years ago-Sex and Shit-Wife-Post Rating : 29

Anyone who says their wedding day was the best day of their life has obviously never had two snicker bars fall down at once from a vending machine.

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harry7695

4 years ago-In The News-Breaking News-Post Rating : 24

BREAKING NEWS: The government has announced that friendly intimate contact is allowed from May 17th meaning that someone like me will not be affected by this rule at all.

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harry7695

5 years ago-Events-Historic Event-Post Rating : 12

Today has got to be the best day of the year so far!

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12

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harry7695

2 years ago-Other-Random-Post Rating : -3

I walked up to a girl in a bar and said, "You look like somebody who has a boring sex life. My mission tonight is to get you drunk, take you back to my house and give you the best shag ever." She said, "My boyfriend is right beside you." "Good, I'm glad I've got his support."

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harry7695

5 years ago-Jokes With No Home-Random-Post Rating : 14

I spent 14 years learning how to improve my handwriting and now we're using keyboard.

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harry7695

4 years ago-Sports-Olympics-Post Rating : 8

I just saw Craig David with the Olympic Archery team. He's the bow selector.

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harry7695

4 years ago-Other-Computers/Technology-Post Rating : 17

BBC News: Bill and Melinda Gates start divorce proceedings after 27 years of marriage. Apparently she wants a younger man that can give her big and hard instead of Microsoft.

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harry7695

4 years ago-Jokes With No Home-Ironic-Post Rating : 42

If Cinderella's shoe fitted so perfectly, why did it fall off in the first place?

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harry7695

4 years ago-Racism-Chav-Post Rating : 8

How do you Circumsize a chav? Cut off his hoodie.

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