Sickipedia

I was watching TV the other night and an advert came on with one of those little black African babies covered in flies. I immediately grabbed the phone and called the number on the screen. I had to get one, they seem to work so much better than those sticky strips that hang from the ceiling.

A kid came home from school and asked his dad, "Dad, I heard some kids talking about a thing called a vagina. What is a vagina, and what does it look like?" "Well, son, before sex it looks like a beautiful unopened rose." "Wow, what does it look like after sex?" "Well, son, have you ever seen a bulldog eating mayonnaise?"

Why are hurricanes always named after women? Because when they come they are wet and wild, and when they leave they take your house and car.

It's no surprise that an object in space that steals everything and never gives it back is called a black hole.

I got a massive erection today during a routine prostate examination.  I tried to hide it but it was pretty obvious, so I tried to laugh it of instead. Anyway, long story short, I'm no longer working as a GP.

Suicide bombers What makes them tick?

Bison What Australians wash their hands in.

Waiting What a Jamaican uses to measure out his weed.

Yesterday, the rescue workers in Pakistan uncovered nearly 100 bodies at the crash site of the A320. Today, they'll move on to the next house.