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eviltea

Member since 4 years ago

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eviltea

one year ago-Other-Animals

BREAKING NEWS: A werewolf has apparently mated with the Loch Ness Monster. Please share to raise a Were Ness.

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Only one of the e's in the word "toupée" has accepted the fact that he's bald.

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There's a guy out in the cold in the city centre with a sandwich board advertising 'fish pedicure' ... not sure who has the worse job, him or the fish

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It's proving very difficult to find a shop selling "Left Guard" for my other armpit...

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What’s Turkeys favourite breakfast? Quakers Oats

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Shit, imagine trying to play Guess Who these days. “Is yours male” “I’m not sure what they would identify as” “Does he…” “…they”

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eviltea

3 years ago-Other-Women

The wife has just phoned me to tell me that 3 women in her office have received flowers today and they are absolutely gorgeous. I said, “That’s probably why!!”

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eviltea

3 years ago-Racism-White

Booked a Christmas party at a nice restaurant, got there and there’s a bunch of white people sitting on the table. I asked why, she’s said “you did ask for crackers on your table”.

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I've found god. It's my turn to hide now.

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Poppycock is the term for when you smoke too much opium to get a boner.

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