Sickipedia

Whats brown and smelly? Islam.

I saw a muslim girl in Primark contemplating suicide... Well.. she was browsing western clothes so i just assumed....

I wonder how long will it be before everybody has to change their profile pictures and statuses supporting the Westminster attack because it offends muslims?

I was so encouraged to see hundreds of muslim women linking arms in Westminster to show solidarity against extremism. If anything is going to change Islam, its the opinions of their women.

The reporter looked nervously into the camera, "This is one of the largest bodies of Isis soldiers we have ever seen. Camped amid the ruin and derelict structure they are launching missile after missile at their enemy. This is violece on a level we have rarely seen.... Hang on.... ....and they're on their feet and cheering, Bradford have scored the equaliser!"

My wife commented that every human action is the result of a chemical reaction. Makes sense. It explains why she turns green when in close proximity to a superior specimen.

Paul Pogba has gone missing from so many midfield battles now he's being given an honoury rank of General from the French army.

"So as it can be observed such a massive body will eventualy expend its energy and collapse back upon itself. Every atom will be attracted by their own gravity and a neutron star will be born, the most dense and heavy thing known to physics" My students nodded and took notes. My fat cunt of a wife gave us all the finger and continued trying to get out of bed.

Nobody knows how many feminists it takes to screw in a lightbulb. Guess whos fault that is....

There really are no differences between people. My three year old went to his friends birthday party, little Abdul played beautifully with my boy, even though there were cultural differences between the parents there we talked and laughed and joked. Ok... it took half an hour for someone to be brave enough to light the birthday cake candles but other than that...