Sickipedia

I was round at my friends house yesterday. While i was there he asked me if i fancied winding his son after his feed. I thought that's abit harsh so i gave him a dead leg instead.

What do you call a Rabbit with a bent dick ?? Fucks funny

The biggest joke on here is the mard arse silly little bitches bitching about scores and rigged votes you absolute sad fucks. I mean really ! Sort your fucking life out you bunch of sad cunts

I was out shopping with the wife the other day when i saw a group of young ladies all wearing mini skirts. I said, "Ooh look at those legs, I bet you wish you had legs like them?" She didn't answer, but I think it upset her because I heard her sniffle as I wheeled her up the ramp into Waitrose.

I brought a dog off the local iron mongers today. As soon as I got him home he made a bolt for the door.

BREAKING NEWS The inventor of the red card has sadly passed away. He was given a good send off.

You've heard of elf

BREAKING NEWS The inventor of the jug has sadly passed away. Tributes have been pouring in.

There's a nudist convention on in my town tomorrow. I might go if I've got nothing on.

I went into a flag shop yesterday and asked for a green Union Jack. "Green? We only do them in red, white and blue." said the salesman. "Ok, I'll have a blue one."