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callmesir

Member since 8 years ago

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callmesir

8 years ago-Sex and Shit-Wife-Post Rating : 0

My wife's always walking into things and getting hurt. Today it was our bedroom while I was fucking her best mate.

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8 years ago-Crime-Theft-Post Rating : 0

When someone stole my ID recently, I was absolutely liv.

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8 years ago-Sex and Shit-Wife-Post Rating : 0

I woke up this morning and thought I had tunnel vision. Luckily it was a false alarm, the wife just fancied a 69.

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8 years ago-Other-Stupid-Post Rating : 0

They say that if you shave it off, it grows back thicker. Can't wait to see my new cock.

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8 years ago-Jokes With No Home-Ironic-Post Rating : 7

Having trouble understanding top heavy fractions? Our helpline is open 24/7.

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8 years ago-Sex and Shit-Penis-Post Rating : 0

I lost the tip of my penis in a recent accident. If you can help, give me a bell.

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8 years ago-Other-Shopping-Post Rating : 0

When I went to pay for my items in a spiritualist shop I noticed a sign saying 'Queue on the other side'. So I killed myself.

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8 years ago-Religion-Jewish-Post Rating : 0

If a Jew married Kevin Bacon, would she take his name?

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8 years ago-Sex and Shit-Dating-Post Rating : 2

I went up to a girl at the bar: "Can I borrow your lighter mate?" She said, "I don't smoke, dickhead." "Neither do I" I replied, "I want to talk to your fit friend, you tubby fuck."

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8 years ago-Other-Misunderstanding-Post Rating : 0

I'd been searching for ages but couldn't find my keys anywhere. My girlfriend said, "Look harder." So I got a skinhead and a couple of tattoos, but I still couldn't find them.

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