Sickipedia

James Caan was in my two favourite movies; The Godfather and Honeymoon in Vegas with Sarah Jessica Parker. One, a film where a man wakes up in bed and sees a horse's head lying next to him, and the other a mafia drama.

My wife claimed she was late coming home tonight because she was ambushed by a group of elderly men who pinned her down and repaired her shoes. Sounds like a load of old cobblers to me.

Bars and restaurants are now requiring proof of Ukraine support.

A tranny has won the 'Best Actress' award at this year's Golden Globes. And the underwear that kept her cock and balls in place has won 'Best Support'.

Remember that TV show 'Bread'? I had a small roll in that.

Took my Uncle for a pedicure today and it was fucking shit. He still fancies kids.

My gay son was sick of me making jokes about his sexuality, so he grabbed a kitchen knife and attacked me with it. I'm OK though, as he somehow managed to miss every vital organ. What a shit stabber!

The app is called TikTok, because every video you watch you are reminded of the reasons humanity is running out of time.

Makes sense that Greggs should go into fashion. Their sausage rolls are so flaky you end up wearing half the fucking thing anyway.

Gutted that Dr. Legg has passed away. He's the closest I've been to seeing a fucking GP in years.