Sickipedia

Anyone seen any dolphins?

I wonder what Kobe knew about Hilary?

Did you know the blue whale is so massive that if you put it on a football pitch the match would be cancelled?

Time to learn to use the three seashells

Use chemicals to remove polish and no one bats an eyelid. Use chemicals to remove the Polish and suddenly you're the bad guy

Strange MPs lying in parliament pinching maces is no basis for a system of government.

France is the only African team to make it through to the second round

It's been snowing all night. So: 8:00 I made a snowman 8:10 A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman 8:15 So, I made a snow woman 8:17 My feminist neighbour complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere 8:20 The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it should have been two snowmen instead 8:22 The transgender ma..wom...person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts 8:25 The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot noses, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with 8:28 I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white 8:31 The Muslim gent across the road demands the snow woman must wear a burqa 8:40 Three Police cars arrive saying someone has been offended 8:42 The feminist neighbour complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needs to be removed because it depicts women in a domestic role 8:43 The council equalities officer arrived and threatened me with prosecution 8:45 TV news crew from the BBC shows up. I am asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snowwomen? I reply, "Snowballs" and am called a sexist. 9:00 I'm on the News as a suspected terrorist, pervert, racist, homophobic sensibility offender bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather 9:10 Far left protestors offended by everything are marching calling for my head 9:29 My kids are taken from me and I lose my job

Since the progressives have made blackface socially unacceptable these days, for Halloween this year I am dressing up as Justin Trudeau instead

When it comes to casual sex, women tend to raise the attractiveness bar ("I’ll have a one night stand with someone, but only if he looks like George Clooney"), while men tend to lower it ("It’s just a one-nighter, who cares if she looks like George Clooney").