Sickipedia

My dad is still having regular sex at 95 It's an absolute disgrace He lives with my mum at number 27

A sea Captain pulls up at the pub in his new Bentley. The farmer in the bar says to him "How come you earn enough money to buy a car like that?" The captain replied " I work for Cunard actually" , the old boy looks at him and says "I work quite hard myself but can only afford a second hand Skoda!"

What is the difference between Snow men and Snow women........... Snowballs

I said to the woman at work "Can I smell your Fanny?" "No you fucking can't she replied" " Jesus , it must be your fucking feet then" I responded

My old dad asked if I could get some viagra for him . "Aye aye" , I thought... ."what do you need Viagra for? Mum died 10 years ago" "It's to stopme rolling out of bed while i'm asleep" he said

To the one legged mugger in Camoflage uniform who stole my wallet........ You can hide.....but you can't run Y

I;ve just been awarded an advanced degree in Bra Design . It's a Ph.DD

I went to the library and asked for a book on suicide, fuck off they said , you won't bring it ba..............oh hang on

What's got 100 legs and 4 pubic hairs? The front row of a Justin Bieber concert

Happy IED to all my muslim friends