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alpacino9

Member since 5 years ago

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alpacino9

4 years ago-Other-Random

My leg won't stop mooing. I think I've got a calf injury

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My Chinese neighbour told me he'd just opened a "Crows shop". I said, "Don't you mean a clothes shop?" He said, "A Crows shop!" I said, "OK, I might pop down for a Rook."

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went to a Gamblers Anonymous meeting last night , They sat me next to this fruit machine addict. It was fucking horrible the twat was nudging me all night

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Never trust hair dressers. They are always talking behind your back.

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alpacino9

one year ago-Other-Dad Jokes

Got a pair of boxers with the London Underground tube map on for Xmas. Already had to change twice.

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Just heard Chris Rea has re-released his big Xmas hit for the Welsh, it’s been renamed “Driving Home for Easter”

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Phillip schofield starring in a new Joseph and the amazing Technicolor dreamcoat “Any teen will do “

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alpacino9

2 years ago-Other-Animals

My dog only responds to commands in Spanish. He's Espanyol

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Even the disabled section of old Trafford have walked out Remarkable scenes

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My friend asked to borrow some money after losing his job at the local hospital as a Stool Sample analyst, of course I couldn't let him down, Not after all the shit he's been through...

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