Sickipedia

I just heard there was a bomb threat at Legoland.....well,if there was a place that was easy to rebuild.

I had been seeing this girl for a while and she asked how many sexual partners I'd had. "I've been very unlucky," I said. "Only four." "Four?" she replied. "That's not unlucky." "It is when they were Jimmy Savile, Rolf Harris, Gary Glitter and Fred Talbot," I answered.

William Shatner, alias Captain Kirk, has discontinued his ladies underwear range. In hindsight "Shatner Knickers" wasn't a good choice of name in the 1st place.

I had a job at a Cadbury's factory putting fudge bars in to boxes. I had to quit though because every time someone would walk past they would say, "Oh packing fudge are we?" Or "Hey up, he's packing fudge again." Since then I've applied for a job in a clothing factory lifting boxes of shirts. I'm hoping the name calling will stop now.

A drunk man walks in to a bar. He draws an imaginary line down the middle of the room with his hand and says "You lot on the left are a bunch of fucking wankers, and you lot on the right are fucking cunts" A huge bloke gets up and booms "I'm not a fucking wanker" "Well get over there with the cunts !"

Hunting....a German to a Jamaican

Sex. What posh folk get their coal delivered in.

Sentimental.....a perfumed lunatic.

My blind date didn't last too long last night,when she asked me my least favourite night of the month i dont think shower night was the right answer

Smelly,bigoted,neandrethal,cowardly,cunts...ting. What Jamaicans call terrorists.