Sickipedia

David Lammy is now in charge of MI5. There's a Bond remake begging to be made: On her Majesty's Secret Cervix.

Tempted to pay for one of those 'trick a woman into bed' courses. But is there a 'trick a woman into thinking she enjoyed it' follow up?.

Rachel Reeves said that she intends to bring the state pension age back down to 65. So long as all of your grandparents are alive and still in work.

I don't know why anyone is surprised at the amount of male Muslims moving to the UK illegally Forced entry is very much in keeping with their culture

A country is like a woman... It loses its value and appeal when just anyone is allowed to enter it... And it's filthier and filthier the more pakis it's had in it

The family dropped the hint and bought me a state of the art male grooming kit. You think you're spick and span, when out of the blue, you feel a nasal hair brush your knee.

Police have put a cordon around a local park, after a woman's body was found. Why, do they think she's going to make a run for it?.

Ofgem has 1700 staff and a £130m wage bill. That's a lot of fucking money just for one of em to say: Bills are going up again.

Successive governments have closed so many museums, you start to wonder how much Tutankhamen's death mask would fetch on Dickinson's Real Deal.

If Bargain Hunt is filmed at genuine car boots, how come the teams never buy any stolen power tools or duty free Russian fags?.